Todd Herman is the award-winning author of the WSJ bestseller ‘The Alter Ego Effect’, performance advisor to athletes, leaders and public figures, and is the recipient of the Inc. 500 fastest growing company award. He’s been featured on the Today Show, Sky Business News, PBS, and over 50 media outlets. He lives in New York City with his young family and is the world’s worst Ukulele Player.
1. What does thriving mean to you?
For me, thriving is laughing my ass off. So many great things come out of side-busting laughter.
2. What’s the one domino that moves you toward thriving?
An attitude of playfulness. There’s a whole set of psychological switches that get flicked on, when you approach tasks, projects, moments, challenges or obstacles with a mindset of, “I wonder…” or “I’m curious…” or “haha… let’s try this…”. You become a real master of your mental dominion with a mind-frame like that.
3. What was or is your favourite way to sabotage yourself?
Isolation. I’m a huge extrovert, and if I don’t have moments in my day where I’m interacting with other people physically, then it’s a recipe for low energy and a feeling of lack of connectedness.
4. How do you deal with challenging times?
I immediately reach out to my trusted friends and advisory group. The science doesn’t lie… a constant in every single human’s life, is the lack of ability to get perspective on our own challenges—on our own. Having smart friends, smart advisors, or smart mentors help you see around corners, is the fastest path to great resolutions to challenges.
5. What was an embarrassing/painful moment you can share?
I spoke at a college student leadership conference in Las Vegas to 13,000 young students on, ‘The Value of a First Impression: How To Master The Mental Game To Win After College’ in 2004. 3 minutes before my talk was ending, I caught the 25 foot version of me on the jumbotrons and noticed my zipper on my pants was wide open. What an idiot! But… I’m a really quick thinker, so I ended my talk by saying: “Now, I’ve just spent the last 45 minutes SHOWING you the value of a first impression. And HOW did I show you? Well a tiny bit of it was with my words… but MOST of it was with my fly down. And I’m sure most of you have been chuckling or talking about me to your friends, and you missed the entire content of my talk. So… don’t show up to meetings, interviews or parties, with your proverbial fly down.” The crowd went wild. And when I walked off stage the conference organizer said, “You’re either the smartest person I’ve met. Or you’re an INCREDIBLY quick and lucky person.” My response with a slightly pinkish hue on my cheeks was, “I ain’t that smart!”
6. What did you learn recently?
I learned my 2.5 year old boy, Charlie, is absolutely nuts for the best corned beef & pastrami in the world at the iconic Katz’s Deli here in New York City. And I hope you do too!!!
7. Divide your age by half , who were you then?
I was an insecure, and constantly concerned about what other people thought of me young man. But I was relentless. I never stopped trying, despite the poor perception I had of myself.
8. Think back 5-10 years, what moved the needle in your success?
My wife. Period. End of story. I married my biggest fan and she gives me superpowers I wouldn’t otherwise have. Plus she’s given me three little superheroes that fill me with purpose every day.
9. Whats the one resource you would recommend?
Establishing your own philosophy on life. Snatch the pen from others hands and YOU define what you are, and who you’re becoming.
10. What is your favourite quote or motto?
“Come and get me.” This is the first thought I think when I wake up, to send a message to the goblins of fear, mediocrity and apathy.
11. What are your top VALUES?
Relationships. Humor. Bravery. Hope. Creativity.
12. What is your focus over the next 12 months?
Continuing to get my book ‘The Alter Ego Effect’ into as many hands as possible.
13. You write a book for your grandkids / next generation, what principles do you want to pass on?
Pursue and attack the ‘struggle of life’. Love it, embrace it, and conquer it, because the version of you on the other side of doing tough stuff the version of you you’re going to love to meet.
14. You start a podcast, who is your first guest? If you have a podcast who would you love to have on?
15. What are you thankful for?
My mom and dad. They gave me the bedrock foundation to be able to do some pretty good things so far.
16. If someone grew up in a dysfunctional home what advice would you give them going forward?
Find the superpowers that experience gave you. Where there’s dark there’s light. One thing can’t exist without the other. While that dysfunctional home can be easily turned into a negative story that traumatizes you, it can also be turned into an empowering story that can satiate the appetite of hope in others.
17. What is your favourite memory of the last 12 months?
Hearing my 6 year old daughter tell other people in an elevator to go buy her dad’s book about glasses.
18. Do you have a favourite joke or a funny moment?
Yes. So next time you meet me…ask.
19. What do you need to have LESS of in your life?
Raging sirens in New York City. FUCK! There goes another…
20. What rule should we be breaking?
21 . What’s the one thing you want to do before you die?
Have only one tab open in my browser.
22. What is a step you would recommend one take to improve their life?
Go to more events where amazing people will be congregating.
23. Who is the PERSON you would love to acknowledge by nominating them to be showcased @ THRIVEMASTERS?
24. How can people connect with you?